All right. Not us. Probably not me, anyway.

But can you think of a more appropriate spot for them in these United States than sin city? Unless...

... no, I don't think Fantasy Island is a real place. You couldn't have a conference there.

The SCOForum for this year has a James Bond theme, with the page showing a man with a gun. "Live and Let Die" they call it. Those SCO rascals are such cut-ups.

Maybe they just mean to let us know they can get out of tight spots? Or maybe they are planning on shaking down their guests. Maybe they're just too dumb to have a sense of irony.

An earnest footnote tells us that MGM kindly gave permission to let them use the Bond theme. Thank heavens, at least SCO is still upholding high moral values in this wicked age of IP pirates. I'm sure there are some depraved souls who'd have a conference with a James Bond theme and never even ask permission.

This tells us how important it was to them to use that theme. Can you imagine? What are they thinking? Don't they have a PR team? They must, because Darl said he couldn't tell us who saw the code unless he got with his PR team. Well, I think they need a new team.

HP is sponsoring their opening day reception, according to this page and they are sending a VP to give a speech. Hmm.

So, who else is going? Well, in addition to the usual suspects from SCO, and poor David Boies, SCO's new joint venture partners are going, TAKGroup. Huh? It seems, since August 4, SCO is going into the oil business, sort of. Or anyway, TAKGroup does the software and SCO, um, well, they have the ... We'll let CITGO explain why SCO and TAKGroup are made for each other:

CITGO Petroleum Corporation's General Manager Specialty Sales, Rob Kress, highlighted the value of this joint venture. "We've been using TAK's products for over five years," said Kress, "which are tailor made to doing business with our trading partners and customers both domestically and internationally over the Internet. The combination of those superior products with the reseller network of SCO and deep global support channel make the SCO-TAK business combination a powerful force in helping the downstream petroleum industry automate its value chain."

This wouldn't have anything to do with stock value, would it?

Next, I wondered if CITGO is a Fortune 500 company. I checked, but they don't run Linux. They run Windows, DOS and AIX. They have had one employee try Debian, but it was too hard for him. He couldn't even get it to download. So, they can't be the company that signed up for a Linux license, if SCO can be believed that somebody did sign up and it wasn't just the Ghost of Christmas Past or Hamlet's father that Darl saw. I think 007 needs to look into that contraband AIX though. Doesn't SCO care that CITGO is violating their Most Holy IP? CITGO may come to rue the day they got involved with these desperado Bond guys. This article says CITGO is already deeply in debt, so here's hoping they have indemnification and all.

The timing is handy, just before SCO has to file with the SEC. At least now maybe their financials won't have all arrows pointing straight down toward the center of the earth. That can definitely get people wondering about the value of their stock. Now they'll have more than the two customers they reported last time, if I recall correctly. But who is TAKGroup? And why are they interested in SCO? The press release explains:

The SCO Group, a leading provider of business software solutions, today announced the creation of a joint venture with the TAKGroup, a leading eBusiness and Internet technology solutions company for the downstream petroleum industry. The downstream petroleum industry includes oil refining, distribution and marketing. The close partnership will allow SCO and its large reseller channel to deliver comprehensive Web-based services to the global downstream petroleum industry and add the technology offering to the company's SCOx Web Services initiative. TAKGroup will demonstrate its Web Services technology and integration with SCOx at SCOForum in Las Vegas, August 17-19, and provide hands-on technical training to SCO partners on the 19th.

This instructor-led, hands-on training introduces SCO Resellers to industry leading solutions specific to downstream petroleum. Resellers can expect to gain the knowledge necessary to successfully sell, setup and manage primary downstream petroleum software modules for Fuels Management, Lubricants Management and Oil Analysis, as well as explore solution integration opportunities for this vertical marketplace.

Resellers of specialty apps, back office solutions, point of sale systems and tank monitoring systems and Systems Integrators and ISVs should attend this training. Basic Internet and Internet browsing knowledge is required.

Resellers who take this class and are certified are qualified to immediately receive leads currently available.

Thanks to a generous donation from CITGO, the Calallen Independent School District has access to two new Internet research labs. The computers were donated to the school district when they became surplus equipment as part of CITGO's computer upgrade plan in Corpus Christi. In a pilot project, the 100 MHz Pentium machines were configured to use Linux, a free operating system, instead of Windows, which would have to be purchased for each computer by the district. Linux was installed on two 15-seat computer labs in the high school and middle school libraries. A web browser, word processor, spreadsheet, and other personal management software loaded on each computer allow not only Internet access, but provide full-featured workstations that can be used by students and staff.

Everything installed on these computers is free, open-source software, which is the primary reason for exploring Linux as a solution in the school district. Also, since Linux can run well on older machines, it allows the use of computers that would not be able to run the newest versions of standard Microsoft products such as Windows and Office. This adds years to the usefulness of otherwise obsolete equipment, at a price the school district can afford.